It came to me in my waking hours. That time where my gray matter is usually running the morning diagnosis – making sure all systems are go after a poor night’s sleep, flushing out one random earworm that somehow surfaced from my subconscious (this morning it was Gordon Lightfoot’s “Carefree Highway”) and stumbling to the bathroom to take care of those things that never used to wake me up before I turned 40. It was during this time that I discovered I had a new routine that was shoehorned into my morning cognitive schedule. The new routine was just a word, but what that word meant and represented was as clear as a Naboo stream. The word was REBOOT.
Let us face the hard facts – Hollywood is creatively bankrupt. The lack of new and fresh ideas has given way to rehashed franchises, movies based on toys and board games and the reboot. Ah, the reboot. Taking a movie or TV show that once held an important place in the hearts and minds of people and trying to recreate the same emotions with a younger cast, fresh take on the story, or just more glitz, CGI and special effects. Hollywood has produced 7 Spider-Man movies with 3 different actors and 3 different “universes”. J.J. Abrams used his voodoo juju to reboot the Star Trek franchise to mixed results while raking in the box office gold. Kevin Smith even confessed to the act by naming his latest movie JAY AND SILENT BOB REBOOT, without a hint of shame.
Reboots are now a part of the entertainment world. You can’t avoid them. They are everywhere and everyone is getting in on the act.
So, where am I going with this? I assure you I am not talking about rebooting our precious Star Wars movies. No. That would be insane.
I am talking about the toys.
Thanks to THE MANDALORIAN, we now have the first, live action screen time for the Imperial Troop Transport. The 1979 Kenner vehicle that never saw a lick of screen time in the original trilogy is now on full display on the Disney + series. That version is a soon to be released Hasbro vehicle for our beloved 3 ¾ action figures. Lovingly based on the original Imperial Troop Transport, this version is a sleeker, more refined vehicle that captures the essence of the original but has a more modern take on the concept.
In essence – a REBOOT.
So, before Star Wars fandom, my friends and family, and my force infused maker, I proudly and boldly state –
HASBRO…REBOOT MY TOYS!
Please take my childhood LAND OF THE JAWAS with its cardboard backdrop and exclusive escape pod and bring it into the roaring 20’s. Reestablish the CREATURE CANTINA as the only place a spacer action figure can go to find a job in Mos Eisley. Take my beloved DEATH STAR SPACE STATION playset and give it that sweet reboot action that Hollywood bestowed upon TOMB RAIDER, HELLBOY and GHOSTBUSTERS – take what was once sacred and make it different, yet familiar.
Hasbro, please reboot the toys from my youth. Take what was old and treasured and weave your magic to make something relevant to this day and age with the proper nostalgic appeal for us old nerds. Heck, Super 7 did it with the Masters of the Universe SNAKE MOUNTAIN. Make it crowd funded if you have to. I long for the day when I can go to my local Target and pick up the rebooted DROID FACTORY playset. I’m sure something like that would have to be rebooted with a hint of modern technology thrown in the mix…maybe an app that would help one plan what droids to create or some scanning feature that would show how your creations would move. I don’t care. I want a plastic, 3 ¾ scale reboot. And I want it now.
In the shrinking, if not dying, modern Star Wars collectors market, something needs to be done to reignite the passion collectors once had. Golden action figures didn’t do it. I’m guessing the lack of product for RISE OF SKYWALKER didn’t help matters either. I’m not saying rebooting Kenner’s line of toys from the 70’s and 80’s is the answer, but it might be a step in the right direction. The Vintage Collection seems to fly off the shelves as soon as they are put out and vintage packaging seems to be all the rage. Nolgastia sells. Hasbro, take it to the next level and give me a Rebooted childhood.